Donald Loves Me?

Over time I have managed to land on email lists for both the Democrats and the Republicans.

It has proven to be an interesting experience. I can receive emails within hours of each other from the opposing sides both claiming the other is raising more money, usually a lot more money, so my donation is urgently needed.

They both can’t be right. Can they both be wrong?

One interesting tactic is “surveys.” I put those in quotes because I doubt either side cares about what I think. They both end with requests for money.

There is one fascinating difference between the two. The Democrats allow you to submit the survey without donating. Now whether that is to make you think they actually care what you think or a cynical move to guilt you into giving, I leave that up to you to decide. I can go either way. I didn’t donate anything but still got on their mailing list.

The Republicans, on the other hand, won’t take your “survey” unless you kick in some money. That’s how I got on their list. I donated $1 to see what would happen. As I suspected, no response except getting put on their mailing list.

The emails from the opponents span the spectrum of pleading, threatening, and demanding. Now the Republicans do so something the Democrats don’t. Actually, two things. They try to sell a variety of merchandise, such as hats, mugs, and so on.

The other thing that really caught my attention was an email purportedly from Donald Trump that started out: “I love you.”

Ah, yeah.

Hey, Donald, I’m not your type. I’m not a female porn star, and certainly out of your age range that you prefer.

Besides, I’m already spoken for.

Sorry, Donald.

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